A Merry Christmas Memory

My most memorable Christmas still lives vividly in my mind. It got cold enough where I grew up in South Texas for an occasional fire in the fireplace. But we didn’t have a fireplace. This particular Christmas, my dad wanted to surprise my mother with a new fireplace in our den. He wanted to build a fire in the new fireplace on Christmas Day too, so us boys had to chop and store firewood – without my mother knowing. We began a month before Christmas cutting down old trees and trimming overgrown trees, hiding the wood at a location away from our home, as to not to ruin the surprise. All the secrecy was worth it, my mother was truly surprised! She enjoyed every minute of warming up by the nice warm fire that Christmas Day.

Being a part of that special gift made the season extra special for me. It sticks out in my mind because nothing about the gift was usual –not the way it was given or the preparing for its use. Christmas comes every 365 days on December 25th , we can count on that. I hope you spend as much time preparing for the birth of the Savior of the world, Jesus Christ, as you do preparing for parties, gift exchanges, traditions, and other things that fight for our attention. Remember, Jesus is the most important reason why we celebrate Christmas, not Santa Clause and his elves.

Take time this Christmas season to celebrate who Jesus is in your life. Take time to start a new tradition of pausing and seeking the Lord, much like the magi did long ago. Remember Matthew 6:33, “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.” I challenge you to write down how much time you spend shopping, decorating, partying, watching football, and cooking…and spend an equal amount of time alone with God. I know when you take time out of your busy schedule to reflect on the reason for the season, this Christmas will be more memorable than any other.

Time Well Spent

Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram, Messenger, Skype, Oovoo, Text, Email are all ways to communicate via technology. It is amazing how much time is spent interfacing with others that is not even face to face. According to BusinessNewsDaily, the average American spends 23 hours a week emailing, texting, and using social media. This is equivalent to 14% of the total time in a week. Let’s compare these numbers to the interface time we spend with God.

George Barna research tells us that the average American prayer lasts just under 5 minutes. 37% of Americans say that they pray once a day. Churchleaders.com has found that pastors median daily prayer time is 30 minutes a day. Even if we take the best prayer examples in this country, the average prayer time a week is 3.5 hours a week. Compare that to the amount of time we spend in social media a week. We are giving much more attention to other people and our technology than we are to God.

I want to encourage you to pray. Jesus encouraged his disciples to pray. The entire chapter of John 17, is dedicated to Jesus’ prayer life. He prayed for himself, his disciples, and for all believers. The Bible contains 377 references to praise and 375 references to prayer. In John 15:4-5 we are exhorted to remain in Jesus so that we can accomplish all that God has for us to do. Prayer ought to be the foundation of our relationship with Christ. Our lives are transformed and our character becomes more Christ-like when we spend time with Him. If you don’t have a plan to meet with Jesus daily, start one. Schedule that time on your daily calendar just like you would every other appointment. May we be a people of prayer!

“Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests by made known to God. And let the peace of God, which surpasses every thought, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7 (HCSB)

New Beginnings

This is birthday week in the Durham household. Our oldest, Dustin, just turned twenty-two yesterday and our next oldest, Melody, turns twenty-one in a couple of days. As I think back to the birth of all three of my children, I can still remember all the emotions, excitement, and anxiety that came over me in that wonderful moment called birth. I knew my life was changing in a different way as the addition of a child came into our family, but I could not fully realize the joy, frustration, challenges, pride, choices, conversations, and fleeting time that I would have with each one of them. And to think all of this just happened twenty-two years ago. Time flies by. With each one of my children there was a beginning point of relationship that led to a blossoming relationship that I treasure today. Along the way lots of other family members and friends built relationships with our family as well. We treasure all of those too.


As I reflect upon the new beginning that my children’s birthday represent, I cannot help but think about the new and great beginning Terri and I find ourselves in now. I have begun pastoring a small church in Arizona City, Arizona. This church is in a community of about eight thousand people on the interstate corridor between Phoenix and Tucson. It has a healthy mix of retirees and young families that commute into work and live very busy lives. Our church is averaging about thirty-five people in attendance, but the people want to see God move greatly in our church and community. They are eager and willing to serve Him and serve others. We have much work to do. With all new beginnings come new rejoicing and new challenges. This new beginning in our life is no different.


It has been exciting to walk with God through this new transition in our life. It is exciting to lead a group of people that are eager to see what new thing God has in store for them. It has been exciting to watch God work and see where He leads us next. God has blessed us so richly in our three months here and He has taught both of us to embrace change and new beginnings. (It is much more difficult for me than for my wife.) The greatest thing is that God has renewed an old promise in our hearts. Isaiah 43:18-19, “Do not remember the past events, pay no attention to things of old, Look, I am about to do something new; even now it is coming. Do you not see it? Indeed, I will make a way in the wilderness, rivers in the desert.” If a Christian is stagnant, it means there is no growth happening. What is God doing new in your life? What new challenges has He put before you? Are you looking for His work and will to be revealed in your new circumstances? Do you need to claim this promise of God today?

Living as a Standby Passenger

A few months ago my wife and I flew to Ghana, Africa. Flying internationally isn’t out of the ordinary for many people these days, until you do it as a standby passenger. Our fight took us from Houston, Texas to Frankfurt, Germany on an A-380, the largest passenger plane in the sky with seats for 550 people. Grateful for the savings our son’s flying benefits afforded us, we experienced heart palpitations for the entire hour and five minute boarding process as we waited to hear our names called, guaranteeing a seat on that behemoth of a plane. Sitting together or squished between arm rest hoarders didn’t matter, all we wanted was a seat bottom cushion that doubled as a floatation device with our name on it (but fingers were crossed for a first class opportunity). I’m pretty sure we were passenger numbers 549 and 550, and our luggage didn’t arrive with us, but that was a small price to pay compared to the money we saved flying standby. I Luv my son’s job.

Have you ever followed God to Africa as a standby passenger? Probably not in the literal sense, but perhaps you’ve experienced heart palpitations after taking a step of faith, unsure of where God is leading. You may have questions that don’t have answers and doubts that make you want to undo the decision you made, but that is all part of living a faith-filled life. Walking by faith means that some things will be revealed in God’s timing and not your own. Walking by faith means that God may assign you a seat next to that arm rest hoarder for a ten hour flight and you’ll have a stiff neck at your destination, but He will always have a purpose for that stiff neck and His purpose is always what is best for you. Walking by faith requires a complete trust in God and His ways.

The early apostles experienced this all the time. Peter had a vision in which God told him that every food was now declared clean. At first, Peter didn’t like what he heard. This was not what Peter was used to or how he was raised. But Peter responded to what God was telling him and as a result of his living on the edge (in faith) saw Cornelius and his entire family get saved (Acts 10:9-48). This marked the beginning of Jews and Gentiles coming together and worshipping together in the early church. What if Peter would have refused to live on the edge, to live by faith? How would things have turned out differently? Commit today to walk by faith. Live life as a standby passenger. Trust in God’s will for your life! “For we walk by faith, not by sight.” II Corinthians 5:7

Holding Onto My Toys

Growing up I had certain toys that I loved to play with. My favorite ones were a shiny green John-Deere tractor, a 2-foot long semi-truck trailer, and a truck. These three toys were nothing special, any regular boy would love to play with them. When a friend would come over to play, I would offer him all kinds of other toys but not the ones that were special to me. Though it was a tough lesson, I eventually did learn to share. At an early age, we learn the emotional pain of giving something up that is precious to you. The one thing that pains us so much to give up may be the very thing that God desires from us.

As we approach Mother’s Day, I can’t help but reflect upon the life of Hannah. She gave her firstborn son back to God. She gave this gift to God without any guarantee that she would have any more children. I Samuel 1:28, “I now give the boy to the Lord. For as long as he lives, he is given to the Lord.” This Hebrew word for “requested” has to do with the meaning of Samuel’s name. It literally means “to give over” or “to grant” what was requested. Hannah had received the son she requested and she now grants her son to the service of the Lord.

Can you imagine the emotional struggle she went through leading up to that moment? Three years she cared for Samuel, loving that newborn like only a mom can. The time came for her to fulfill the vow she made to the Lord and she trusted the Lord and moved forward in faith, never looking back. I Samuel 2:21, “The Lord paid attention to Hannah’s need, and she conceived and gave birth to three sons and two daughters. Meanwhile, the boy Samuel grew up in the presence of the Lord.” This is an incredible verse! God knew the sacrifice Hannah had made and blessed her with more children. He rewarded her trust and faith in Him. God operates that way!

What has God asked you to trust Him with? Recently, God has spoken to Terri and me about leaving a secure paycheck with benefits. We are moving forward in faith and have resigned from Trinity Southern Baptist Church in Casa Grande, Arizona. We have loved people, ministered to families, built friendships and made memories here for nearly ten years. It is an emotional struggle to let go and trust God. I am still that small child wanting to hold onto my security. But God wants us to trust Him! What is it that God is asking you to trust Him with today? Trust Him, Have faith in God. He will take care of you and reward you for your faithfulness.

Building True Community

Requires Hard Word. To fulfill my required PE credit in college I searched for the easiest course that was offered. Nothing before 10AM or during meal times would be acceptable. One class seemed to fit that bill - canoeing. I thought, how difficult can it be; get in a boat and ride down the river? I quickly learned how ignorant I was. In fact, that canoeing class turned out to be one of the toughest courses in my college career. Not only did I have to study for two major exams but had to learn how to maneuver through some of the toughest rapids in central Texas. Every week I was paired with a new partner, so I had to quickly learn how to build trust with the other person in the canoe. The communication between us was important to us effectively navigating the dangers we would encounter as we drifted down the river. Both of us had the same goal, get through the rapids without turning over, getting hurt or losing our equipment.

Defining Fellowship. One Biblical word that is used frequently in the New Testament is Koinonia, which is usually interpreted fellowship. In Baptist churches we tend to define fellowship as a group of people eating fried chicken together. Breaking bread certainly is a part of fellowship, but that is a very small part of the original meaning of the word. The Greek word can mean fellowship, a communion, society, partner, companion. In Acts 2:42, we learn that the early church fellowshipped together. This passage gives us the idea that this group did much more than eat together. These people shared real life concerns with each other. They became family to one another. The apostle Paul tells us of three very important people that reached out and gave him the "right hand of fellowship". Paul is saying these men shared their hearts with him when they could have easily turned their back on him. They ministered to him, mentored him, and shared their ministry and life with him. He was forever grateful. (Galatians 2:9)

Fleshing Fellowship Out. Is making fellowship happen easy or hard? Perhaps it's a bit of both. It is hard in the church today because true Biblical fellowship requires people to spend time with each other. We have become a culture of busyness. We have to consciously make time to spend together in smaller groups. Small groups in church life help people connect on a level they are not able to connect in a larger environment. For true koinonia to take place, people must see the importance of making the time to attend small groups and get-togethers outside of the church environment. The early church invested in each other. Rick Howerton wrote a book entitled, "Destination: Community". He points out that to share a meal together or do life together we need to slow down to experience life with intimate friends and family. In Biblical times, meals could last a couple of hours. This is the hard part of fleshing fellowship out today in the modern church. Eating together should be tied to relational intimacy. The short of it is we need to make life in community a daily priority in the church of today.

Fellowship is the same as my canoeing class in college. It is often times misunderstood and there is a great deal more to it than at first glance. Commit today to be an active part of a small group in your church and work hard at building meaningful relationships within your group!

Shining Scars

I have this one scar that is right above my right knee. This scar is almost gone because it is really old (approximately 30 years old). However, the memory of this scar is still in my mind as if it just happened yesterday. This scar is rather embarrassing because it is a visual of a very cowardly moment. My younger cousin was riding on the handlebars of the bicycle that I was peddling and steering for her. We crashed and burned. She was caught under the bike and asking for help when I looked down and saw blood coming out of my leg. I panicked and ran for the house to get myself medical help and attention without rendering aid or concern for my helpless younger female cousin. We can laugh about it today, however, that story and the scar from my stitches is still rather embarrassing for me. You can imagine the teasing I get from my family members and relatives each time they retell that story.


If we are all honest, we all have such scars. Scars that we would just soon forget about. Scars that we would rather hide and not reveal to anyone or perhaps we find creative ways to cover the scars up. As I begin studying the book of Hosea, it is interesting to me that God chose to use this prophet and his family life to teach His people some very important Godly and Biblical truths. The one fact that I can not get out of my head is that God chose to use a troublesome marriage and some difficult family circumstances to make the foundation stone of Hosea's ministry. The second verse in the book of Hosea tells us that the Lord commanded Hosea to marry a promiscuous wife and have children of promiscuity. What are we to do with that kind of verse? God is going to use this dysfunctional marriage and family relationship to teach His people about the parallel between spiritual and marital unfaithfulness. God demands love and loyalty from His own, and many times God's people fail to demonstrate love and loyalty to Him. In spite of this fact, God stands ready to forgive and restore those who turn to Him in repentance.


Allow me to share some personal and applicable truths I receive from this book. First, my family is not perfect and we have scars just like most families do. The truth is God wants my family to be an example of what it means to love and forgive in spite of our scars. Second, God takes some of the ugliest scars and through His supernatural ability to heal, forgive, and restore can make the scar less and less visible. The tragedies of the past within your family or my family, God can use for His glory and His good. It may be difficult for you to see that today, however, trust in God and trust in His Word. If you don't believe me, do your own personal study of the book of Hosea and see what God teaches you and reveals to you. Third, our only hope is God. I don't know what kind of scars you have or the scars that are within your family, but I do know who God is. God assures His people that He would show compassion on them, He would redeem them, He would remove unrighteousness and restore the covenant to His people, and He would rebuild them. They only had to do two things: repent and place their faith back in Him. It's that simple.


The scars in our life that have caused embarrassment, shame, guilt, worry, and trouble can be used to the glory of God. It hinges upon us bringing those scars to the Lord. Remember I Peter 5:6-7, "Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your care on Him, because He cares about you." Matthew 6:33, "But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you."